The Snapettes!

Loz is one of the most wonderful human beings in the world. (Using the term loosely, I admit, but he's still lovely.) He was really nice to me and he's answered some big questions (like why whenever I order bacon it's all blue and sparkly, why my sisters are different from everyone else, lots of things) but raised a lot more.

And he makes some mean chocolate ice cream.

But anyway. It still doesn't explain why I'm different. Am I the anomaly or the control or what, Hojo? What's going on? Why are you doing all this?

Dad, if you're reading this, I want a word. Now. I need to find out what that folder was doing in your office. I need to find out why you've been so friendly with Hojo lately. I need to find out more!

P.S. Loz is really nice to hug. He's sort of warm and cosy and he doesn't mind if you cry on him.

P.P.S. There's a special on filter paper this week. You can buy a packet for 35c - that's less than 0.2c per piece.

P.P.P.S. I ended up checking myself for scales today. Even though Loz assured me that wasn't going to happen, I still worry that I'm going to end up looking like that beautiful-but-abosolutely-flicking-evil Jemnezmy in the year above. You know, the blonde scaly girl I stabbed?

I think I'm in love.

I won't say how, who or anything like that, but he's just so nice and normal and his brothers are totally weird and I think I've found someone who understands what it's like to love and hate all your siblings at the same time.

Plus, he's a lot better looking than his whiny, effeminate brothers.

Even though all my sisters seem to like all his whiny, effeminate brothers.

I haven't actually spoken to him much, but that Emma girl and the Wutaian lad told me all about him and I've seen him and everything and wheeeeeee I feel sunny inside.

Girls, every time I told you off for being melodramatic about a silly crush? Sorry.

-Jane

Well, I'm incredibly short on money, and Sclera won't let me have any, so I'm going to start selling things. More specifically, supplies from my father's Chemistry supply cabinet. I've already checked with him - he doesn't mind, because he's hoping one kid'll blow themselves up using the chemicals.

All prices are negotiable unless otherwise stated.

Stock list:

37 bottles of Universal Indicator. Get 'em before they're gone! (I spilt some on my hand once. Apparently I'm a mild acid.) On special offer this week only - £5 each. Oh. I mean $5. I'm not used to this stupid country and its equally stupid monitary system.

One full gas cylinder - hydrogen I need to check you out before I sell you this, because it's explosive. You could probably make a really kickass flamethrower with it. - $75.

Mercury. It's silver and pretty and dribbly and deadly poisonous, so I'll have to check you out. - $12.

One full gas cylinder - carbon dioxide. Have no idea what you might want it for. You might want to use it for plants or something. They need carbon dioxide, don't they? - $55.

Garotte wire. I found it in there under a pile of books. I'm not sure what Dad wanted it for. I'm smuggling it out as a yo-yo string. Don't tell the father, alright? - $2 per 45cm. I have seventeen metres' worth. Get it before it's gone.

Some weird golden liquid marked FELIX FE (rest of the lable indeciferable). Fe is the chemical symbol for iron, so I think it might be some sort of iron compound. It bubbles a bit when you pour it. Might work as a sort of lava lamp-type thing. - $10. Would be half that, but it's very pretty and it looks great on my bedroom windowsill.

Sodium chloride, tub of. It'd be nice on your fish and chips or with industrial yeast extract on toast. 45c.

DIOHYDROGEN MONOXIDE. This chemical makes up the highest percentage in acid rain, it causes death by inhalation, it's colourless, odourless and mostly tasteless, it's the main cause of coastal erosion, it causes more accidents per year than fire. Nasty stuff. $500 per litre because of its utter deadliness.

Sulphuric acid (concentrate). You could use it for...um, aciding things. I have to check you out first because there's a picture on the label of a man with a little u-shaped blip in his hand and that means it's dangerous. $6.

Copper chloride. Apparently it's toxic. The big skull-and-crossbones told me so. I'll have to check you out first. But it IS sparkly and it IS a pretty green colour and if you dissolve it in water it turns a really pretty blue colour. $10.

Sticks of graphite as used in electrolysis. You could also use them for drawing with, I bet. $1 each.

Ether It burns. You can use it to fake setting fire to things because it's really volatile and it doesn't actually burn what you pour it on. But I'd be careful. $15 for the whole bottle - bargain.

Lithium. All stored in a little plastic case and in a little bottle of oil. I've heard you can use it as a drug - are the Gasts interested? $15.

Potassium. Stored in the same way as the lithium and apparently it's really explosive. You could make it into fireworks or maybe little bombs. $20.

Magensium ribbon. If you set fire to it it burns bright firey white and could probably be used as part of a primitive stun weapon. I wouldn't look directly at it, mind you. $2 per 10cm.

Strange purple fluid scraped from bottom of a freezer unit. Long story, so bear with me. I was cleaning out the freezer unit and there was this weird purple fluid in it and when I tried to clean it up it TURNED INTO A PURPLE WORM THING AND IT BLOODY BIT ME ON THE FINGER. I ran away screaming but when I got my dad back to look at it is was being purple and fluidy again. And then I could clear it up. I scraped it into a little bottle. Some sort of biological culture, maybe? Or maybe just mercury fumes? I have no idea why you might want it, but if you do it'll set you back $20.

A suspicious-looking folder that looks like it was pilfered from the nurse's office because it has her name on it. It's marked PROJECT DOSSIER. I tried to read it but it was just a random collection of characters from what I could tell - in some sort of code, maybe? You could probably use it as scrap paper. FREE for anyone who wants to take it off my hands, since I have plenty of scrap paper already. Why my dad was carrying it around remains unknown.

SO I READ HOW DA SH3L3NAZAK3RS R DISCUSNG HALOWEN11!!1!11 WTF I LOV3 HALOWEN111!1!1! LOL W3R3 AL GONG 2 S2RM DA 2WN DRES3D UP AL NIEC BUT W3 DONT HOW WUT WERE GONG 2 GO AS YAT

I!!!!11 WANT 2 GO AS A BAUTIFUL VMPIER QUEN WIT A H3AD OF NIGHTMAER-BOK HARE AND A SWET FANGAD SMIEL

JAEN11!!!1 OMG WTF LOL SAYS SHE WANTS 2 GO AS SOM3 MAN (!!!!)111!1!!!111!1!111111!!11!1!!11!1!!11!1!!11!1!1!1! CALED SOLID NSKAEO!1!1 OMG WTF I CANT WATE11!! OMG LOL WEL GET AL SORTS OF TASTY THNGS 2 3AT

IF11!!11! OMG WTF LOL ANYONE ELS3S TRIK-OR-TREATNG HOW ABOUT U JOIN US??!?! LOL WE ALWAYS GET LOTS OF THNGS

(JUST!1!1!1 R3CEIVED NOTIEC - IODIEN WANTS 2 GO OUT COMPL3TELY NAEKD1111!1! OMG WTF I DONT WANT 2 THINK ABOUT TAHT SORT OF O1!111)



WTF AND KADAJ I LOVE U SO SO SO SO SO SO MUCH PLZ GO OUT WIT ME?!?!? WTF LOL ^_______^ PLZ I THROW MYS3LF AT UR FET

- S2MATA

[EDIT by Jane - if anyone wants a translation, don't hesitate to ask.)

For those of you who saw a previous entry -

Thanks to Septacaemia's wondrous computer hacking skills, we managed to trace the IP address of the person who felt the need to post THEIR drivel in OUR elljay.

Suffice to say that Iodine has been mobilised and has been inflicting intense pain on the pathetic and distinctly evil hacker for quite some time.

Anyway.

On a more uplifting topic, I accidently bleached my eyebrows during the practical in electrochemisty.

-Jane

I'm really starting to worry about how different I am from my sisters. I can type. I have brown hair and brown eyes - and eyes, not orbs. I get spots from time to time. I can't sing to save my life. And I am NOT a part, and I do NOT want to BE a part, of the cheerleading squad.

This is so very strange. I want a paternity test or something, since I obviously don't have any characteristics that I share with my sisters.

I tried to get that weird school nurse lady to help me out, but she was busy fawning over some ugly grey-haired girl in a pink leather suit. The same ugly grey-haired girl my 'sisters' (am in severe doubt about their status as such) seem to be fawning over all the time.

So. How am I supposed to go about getting my genetic code untangled? Is it just to do with genes being recessive? We don't look that much like each other anyway, since we're all from different mothers, but this is just plain weird.

Oh yeah. M. Xhellia tried to get me to wear a miniskirt today. And they say I'm too young to have cellulite.

And someone told me today that Sephiroth's gay - and not only that, but he's after that redhead nerd. Isn't it weird how it's always the ones you least expect? And that nerd...oh, I don't have very fond memories of him. Anteing that Serra Angel was a mistake. How was I supposed to know that his black-red Pyrotechnics/Necropetance deck was especially effective against my mono-white weenie deck?

I bet that's why I lost so easily.

Anyway. Time to steal Atria's makeup and draw a rude picture on the bathroom mirror with it.

- Jane

*****LOK WHT I GOT FRM SPEHY!!!! 2 COOOOOOOOLLLLLLLLLL!!!******~~**~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~



N MORE:::::::::**~*~*~*~*~*~

tHEsE i TooK mYsELLF WhLI SPhY WsNT lOoOoOoOooooOOOOOOOOKin!!!!


SPEHY)!

SEPY2

SEPH34


SEPP5%

N E TIM U WANT HLP JUS CALLLLLLLLLLL MEEEEEEEE BABBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!111111

P.S. SPEHY IS SO HOTTTTTTTTTRRRRRRR THAN YAZZOOO!


((A/N: BEWARE AT WORK. If any of you other lamers check this thing at work. Bah, guess it's just me.))
((A/N: http://yaoi.y-gallery.net/user/requiem/ is the home of these lovely pics Let us praise her!!!))

(u don have 2 pay atenton if u don want.)

tody wa horrble i had no fends n no lfe an vena-cava tol me taht seprhth wa gay. -____- all teh good mne, huh?

neway my rm strted to hurt gain. is geostigma std? must ask dad. i don wan cath it i herd tha strif kid got it but i tink it wa a lie. itd be a shme to get ti. i don wana die. i hav come cloz enuf alredy.

so i am depressd. oh sephiroht you stil craev teh boobs rite? bcos m.xiella kindaa leiks u. ^^

some1 plz kil me nwo.

amnesia ;__;

We're the Snapettes! We totally like cheerleading and stuff! And Yazoooooo. He's sooooooo dreamy!